6am is an ungodly hour for a Saturday but today we had work to do. I have not seen the sunrise in a very long time. Years actually since I woke early and went somewhere to watch the day break. I am amazed at how much life I’ve been missing in those early morning hours. I packed up the baby, the big one, my camera and a massive cup of coffee and we went to find the sun.
I always wonder what my children will remember from their childhood. Will they remember the big events, the birthday parties and milestones or is it the in-between moments that will stay with them forever. Will our daily shortcomings as parents stick with them more than our successes? What if they only remember the bad and can’t feel how much we loved them?
When my husband talks about his childhood, one of the most lasting and impressionable memories he has is of his dad waking him up in the early hours of morning to go fishing. Before sunrise, still sleepy and warm in his bed. I can almost hear his dad whisper for him to get dressed. I hear the love in my husband’s voice when he tells me this.
I thought of this today. At 6:02 am when I went to go make a pot of coffee and wake my oldest. Except he had heard me stirring and woke himself in an effort not to miss a thing. We grabbed an awfully mismatched outfit with pants that were three inches to short to accommodate his recent growth spurt and a red Christmas sweater with reindeer on it. He found his mud-covered shoes and made no effort to tame the bedhead. He looked wild and unkept and happy as hell.
We watched the sunrise. We talked about school, Christmas and how much he loved his little sister. We talked about what donuts he was going to pick out after. He told me he loved me. I told him I will always love him. He felt special in that way that you can only feel special when someone gives you their undivided attention. I tried hard not to ruin his outing by taking too many photos. I tend to ruin moments by trying to capture them as they happen. But I couldn’t let this moment leave without having this image to forever remember it by.
Happy Sunrise, Friends.